Interview 8

The Gung-Ho Jocks

I move to the end of the run, the Cube.

This interview is with 3 jock types. Like most interviews I have conducted anywhere -- especially those conducted under time pressure or excitement -- interviewees often do not speak in grammatical, fully formed sentences. Usually I make minor corrections to the grammar, in order to make it easy to read and get the point of what people are saying. Below, especially with the very talkative fellow, I have not done this, and instead tried to capture every word exactly.

So read it slowly, with pauses, and remember that you can't read his tone of voice, which varied greatly from phrase to phrase. The tone of voice is loud, jock-like, very assertive and defiant -- intended to be heard by the other two guys as well as everyone around them. I chose two guys for the interview, but it begins with a third one sticking his head in just for the hell of it.

Is this the first time you've run?

Runner #1 [sticking his head in]: I ran it twice!

Runner #2: Class of 2000. The first run of 2000!

Runner #3: All I've got to say is this: Ann Arbor -- A squared, A-2? -- we ran the mile run twice -- two times -- naked!

And it was great, right?

Runner #1: Oh yeah, it was! [Shouting to all:] Freedom of expression!

Runner #2: [Shouting:] I was born naked, and I will remain naked!

Runner #3: [Shouting:] Thank you! That's a good way of putting it.

It is!

Runner # 3: And we're going to remain naked. And the cops? Secretly, I seen them getting naked -- and they were as naked as us. And they propositioned us, too.

Where did you see the naked cops?

Runner # 3: The naked cops? They're everywhere.

Runner #1 [putting special stress, inflecting downward, on each use of the word "legal"]: I'll refer to myself as [he gives a nickname, and after a pause, his zip code and his address], From Ypsilanti, Michigan. Everything in Washtenaw County is legal -- particularly Ann Arbor. Everything is legal. Everybody running together naked? Legal. Naked people? Legal. Cops don't give a shit. We're just going to keep expressing our freedom. Feminists, taking over male jobs? Everything is legal. Who cares? No one cares. I have a friend [who] is going to be president in Ann Arbor, no one cares. And I encourage everyone [to come to the Naked Mile]. I'm going to bring my kids, have a family picnic, at the Naked Mile run. I'm going to propose to my woman here. I'm going to propose to her at the Naked Mile run. When I get a girlfriend, that is. I'm going to be constantly screaming, I'm the "naked [nickname]"! I was born naked, I shall remain naked. Blah blah blah blah. Cops: [they treat you] OK as long as you're off the streets. As long as you're running in a group or something. We got stopped the first time we went to go run -- and the cops said "You have 30 seconds to put your clothes back on or you're going to jail." That's just making it seem like they're just trying to do their jobs but hey -- they're not -- they don't care! They indulge themselves, they like looking at naked people. Whether it be the Internet, or a pornographic video, or if it's right here on the streets -- they don't care.

So they tried to scare you by threatening to arrest you, huh?

They try to scare us by threatening to arrest us -- but threats don't get anywhere -- that's what makes people rebel. But threats? The exact opposite [is what's going to happen]. No one cares about authority on this kind of a night. We will respect the police -- but it's a tradition, a University of Michigan tradition, and we do it to celebrate our graduating, getting [to our] final exams. This is their way of expressing themselves leaving the university. That's all I've got to say, I guess. It's a tradition. Why break tradition? Everything is safe. No one is breaking any laws, everything's fine.

Thanks very much.

Thank YOU very much. [Pronounced deliberately:] Definitely!