	Another quality page linked to Jim's Pen is Central!
This page is finished. Other photos of Bob's dick (being painted in a body-painting contest) will appear one day elsewhere on this site.

Take a Closer Look at the Dick of the Week -- Bob!

Ah, maturity! Ah, wilderness! The combination of the two is intoxicating, eh?

Well it is for some of us. If you are one of the few, the proud, the "not too proud to pay for it" crowd, then this page is for you. Yes, this is the page where we ask to subscribe to see big pictures of Bob, our Dick of the Week for week 1.

If you've read the interview with Bob, you know why we're asking you for some money. It's tough having a big dick in this world! Guys are always after you, being weird, being impolite, always wanting to get into your pants without even the slightest interest in you as a human being. Bob deserves to get a little cash in his pocket for sharing his dick with the rest of the world, right?

Right???!?

OK, OK; here's what Bob's share of your subscription fee can do:

Buy Bob half a cigarette. (Frankly, we don't remember whether Bob smokes or not, but if he does, he'll be grateful!)
Buy Bob a sip of beer at his local gay bar, the San Francisco Eagle. (Frankly, we don't remember whether Bob drinks or not, but if he does, he'll be grateful!)
Buy Bob a 3-minute nap. Remember, rents in San Francisco are among the highest in the nation, and your contribution can help him buy a few minutes' peace from worries about his landlord. After all, it takes lots of rest to replenish the protein, blood supply, and all the other nutrients necessary for the healthy operation of Bob's pen is -- and a nap helps in each and every one of those ways! Your contribution works twice as hard -- both financially and physiologically!
Bob has generously signed a model release which gives us permission to post photos of him here on the website. Every time someone downloads a big picture of Bob, Bob gets a royalty. Let us apologize in advance for this shamelessly commercial arrangement. In a perfect world, we would all be able to save money by travelling naked, sitting on nothing more than a towel, putting the dry cleaners out of business, making sure that Calvin Klein goes out and gets a real job, and never having to worry about drying out our bathing suits. But that's not the world we live in. Everyone wants his cut, so we'll just have to accept that as a fact of life and move on.

Thank you, thank you! God bless you! God bless America! Thank God we live in a free country, where pen ises can be free if their owners will permit them to be, where they can wave in the wind like Old Glory herself, where even a middle-aged guy with an average dick can collaborate with a middle-aged guy with a big dick to suck the loose change out of your pants (another reason not to wear them, eh?) in America's grand and glorious capitalist tradition! Bob thanks you, I thank you, and my landlord thanks you. You are truly, truly wonderful!!

But aside from our thanks, you'll know that by subscribing for a month or two, you can inspire other clothes-infested men to drop their inhibitions here on Pen is Central's Dick of the Week pages. Most will be unknown heroes of the nudist revolution, hidden in obscurity -- until they appear here. And then they will achieve far more than their ordinary 15 minutes of fame.

But if some incredibly famous guy wants us to publicize his dick here, we're more than willing. Are you listening, Leonardo? Tom? Jean-Claude? Wesley (pant pant pant)?? (Arnold, put yours back. We've already had enough of you.) Yes? Wonderful! Have your person call my person, and then give me a ring. Thanks!

This is a picture of Bob standing next to me. It's pretty darn clear that Bob's soft dick hangs down quite a bit more than mine.

Boo hoo! Isn't that humiliating? Boo hoo hoo!

In my defense, let me point out that Bob shaves his pubes and I don't, so the base of my dick is concealed somewhat. Does that make up for it? Ha ha ha! Take pity on a poor Webmaster, click on the photo, and thereby contribute to the Webmaster NotWellHung Psychological Compensation Fund.* Thanks!

Here's the other humiliating picture you'll get of Bob standing next to me. You can see that Bob has (1) more hair on his head, (2) cooler shades, (3) a flatter tummy, (4) a better tan, (5) a thicker dick, and (6) a MUCH longer dick than I do.

In my defense, let me point out that I'm not completely hard in this picture; I get bigger. (I was in a hurry, OK?)

In Bob's defense, I must point out that he's not completely hard, either.

Boo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo! Take pity on a poor Webmaster!! *

* Note for the humor impaired: I'm joking. Please do not send me hate mail complaining that I'm "putting down" guys with small dicks, or bears, or middle-aged guys, or whatever. Instead, send your hate mail to billg@microsoft.com and in the meantime listen to more British comedy routines so you can understand when somebody's pulling your leg. And seriously, folks, I'm well aware that there are guys who want to get f*ucked by someone my size, because they're tight down there and fear that a guy like Bob will rip them apart. I mean, even if that's not completely true it'll increase my chances of scoring, right? -- so let's do what we can to propagate that idea. Thank you for your cooperation. Consolation letters, promises of eternal love and adoration of my bearishness, etc., can be sent to phdtop@phdtop.com.

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