Arrests, Citations, and Lots of Naked Runners!! Politicians' Cowardly Attempts to Use Local and Campus Police to Stop Traditional Run -- Blasted to Smithereens! God Blesses Run, Provides Perfect Weather What's New You Can't Win When God is on the Nudists' Side 2000 2000 Dick of the Millennium Go to our Dick of the Week page and vote for Dick of the Millennium. Polls close soon! The NEWSPAPER OF RECORD for the pen is-consuming community All the Nudes Unfit to Print 15 April 2000 Incorporating the Nude Cock Times, the Newdick Daily Newds, and the Penisylvanian Observer Pen is-related features for the discriminating pen is-consuming public -- providing you with your minimum daily ADULT requirement. Very nearly FREE Cops Can't Stop Naked Mile Politicians Lose; Students Win Careful but Doomed Police in Losing Battle Reported on the scene by JIM W. Let the politicians and geezers note: It is a waste of taxpayer money to try to stop college students from running naked through the streets of Ann Arbor. They tried to repress the forces of freedom, and they lost big. Power goes to those who take it, and last night the students took it all. Police arrested one guy -- and forced him to walk naked, handcuffed, down the street. They cited another guy and his girlfriend -- not for nudity but for driving his motorcycle on the sidewalk! They threatened three jocks with arrest if they didn't put their clothes back on "in 30 seconds" -- but the jocks just laughed at them and ran off nude into the night. The police were only doing what the politicians forced them to do. They acted professionally, courteously, and with restraint. But they were on the losing side of a battle royal between the forces of evil -- conservative politicians and clueless letter-writing geezers -- and the spirit of body acceptance and freedom of association. It was no contest. If I were the Chief of Police, I'd be hopping mad -- not at the students, but at my bosses. How embarrassing! What a wild goose chase! What a waste of crimefighting funds! Obviously tipping the scales in the direction of His or Her chosen people (the naked runners), God stepped in and provided a nearly-full moon and impossibly good weather. More... Jocks & Freedom Triumph Again! Reported by JIM W. They said they were going to put a stop to this tomfoolery. They said they wouldn't stop traffic along the main route of the run. They refused to direct traffic at the starting point of the run. They set up an observation station on the top of a building near the start, helicopters overhead, aggressively tried to videotape reporters such as myself and intimidate us. In short, they cajoled and threatened and rattled their sabers. But it didn't work! Last night, the forces of evil lost badly. They managed to delay the start of the run by a half hour or so. And today, they've merely shown how powerless the forces of repression are in the face of well-educated, freethinking students who don't want politicians meddling in their traditions. And with all the publicity generated by the arrests, now everyone knows it. More... FRONT PAGE PEN IS STORE WORDS & PUZZLE DICK OF THE WEEK ARTS & DANCE PHOTOGRAVURE THIS & THAT EDITORIAL STAFF SUBSCRIBE Thanks to wonderful badpuppy.com people, we have ultra-low-cost web space permitting us to serve the pen is-consuming public for free as always. Such a great company!!! Thank you, thank you again, badpuppy.com! We adhere strictly to a Code of Ethics What's New CIRCULATION (since 1 July 1997) One million attained the evening of 8 July 1999 or early morning 9 July What's Here PEN IS CENTRAL Long may it wave! Click to join the OneList pen-is-central list. It's free! You can be anonymous! No overflowing mailbox -- just one message every 2 weeks!!      Wholly owned subsidiary of Jim's Pen is Central Empire -- a monumental tax deduction scheme registered in the state of Nude Texaco

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