Jim's Pen is Central Page is proud to present our 54th

Dick of the week

Mark

Week 52

Mark is difficult to miss.
Why? I'll be honest. It's because he has a big dick. Is that shallow of me? I don't think so; it's just a fact. His dick is thin and looooong, and that combination means that it swings back and forth (see animations at right) and flops around and in general catches my attention out of the corner of my eye. Your eye, too, if you're honest about it. When he's naked, it's right there in front of you . And at a gay naturist gathering, you're allowed to look!

I first met Mark at one of those gatherings. I noticed him a lot at the erotic photography seminar, where he was one of the most willing models. How about posing with this guy over here...? OK. Now put your arms around each other... Good! Do you think you could get it a little harder? Sure... And then he'd start stroking it, and soon he was on his back getting a blowjob and surrounded by the biggest collection of snapping cameras you've seen outside of a Kodak convention.

Did I mention that Mark is blond? And tan? And slim? And tall? And quite pleasant to look at above the neck? And available (to watch) at two bars in our nation's capital? And (ahem) why did I wait until now to tell you that he's smart and college-educated?

I don't know. It's certainly not because I'm shallow -- I hope :P. Read on!

So... let me begin with the standard Dick of the Week question: just how big IS your dick, anyway?

Oh, God... it's about 9 inches, I guess. I haven't measured it.

How big around?

I don't know. [He laughs and pulls it up; we're sitting face to face.] What do you think? An inch and a quarter? I don't know.

So when you jerk off, can you get your hand around it?

Yes.

When you're holding it with one hand, does your thumb touch your index finger?

Yes.

How much overlap?

When it's hard.... not much.

So do you lose partners who think that you're too big for them?

[He smiles and thinks a lot.] No. I can be a bottom, too!

Which do you prefer in a partner: a big dick or a small dick?

A big dick.

Why?

More to hold on to when I'm fucking him.

So you can be a top, too!

Yes.

What's the biggest dick you've ever had sex with?

[He thinks a long time.] About 10 inches.

The smallest?

Less than one inch.

Tell me more about each of those two guys.

The biggest guy was a lot more fun because we switched positions a lot. I fucked him, then he fucked me, and back and forth. I met him at a bar where I meet most of my dicks. He was a nice southern boy, with the coolest southern drawl.

The small guy was just another dancer who liked to get fucked. The kind you take home when all else fails. Luckily he doesn't think he's gay so he won't be reading these notes on your site. If he did he would know exactly who I'm talking about.

So you knew he had a small dick before you went home with him?

Yes.

Which is easier to keep hard -- a big dick or a small dick?

I would guess a small dick. I don't know... I only have a big dick; I can't compare. I guess a big dick just takes more blood.

What famous person's dick would you like to see the most?

I guess Brad Pitt.

What famous person would you most like to show YOUR dick to?

[He pauses and seems to be thinking up an answer on the spur of the moment.] I guess George W. Bush. But I wouldn't go out of my way to show it to him.

Why him?

Just to see the look on his face.

Scientists have perfected a penis-transplant operation, and they want you to donate 2 inches of your dick for transplantation to someone less fortunate than you. How much would they have to pay you to get you to agree to the donation?

No fucking way! Not one bit is available for sale!

Would it matter if the recipient was your brother?

No, it wouldn't. I've seen my brother and an extra 2 inches wouldn't be of any value to him. Besides, he's straight and it makes me sick to think of 2 inches of my dick going into his wife...! [He laughs.]

Would it matter if the recipient was your boyfriend?

No.

How often do guys tell you that you have a big dick?

[He thinks a bit.] Probably 30 or 40 times a week.

Why so often?

Because I dance naked [at a gay bar] and I'm often erect and in people's face with it.

I take it that from time to time guys come on to you just because you have a big dick.

Yes, quite often.

How does that make you feel?

I like it.

How often do you get the impression that someone is interested in you ONLY because you have a big dick?

90% of the time.

How old were you when you first realized that your dick was bigger than most other guys'?

Seventh grade. [He sighs.] I was the first person in my class to go through puberty, and in the shower for gym class once when everybody was noticing my dick and talking about it I got semi-aroused, which really was the talk of the class.

For how long?

For quite awhile, actually. The next day in study hall the teacher left the room for a few minutes and this loudmouth kid, not a friend, decided to announce to all the girls that I had gotten aroused in the shower. Up to that point in my life I was very shy, but when he said that I became so angry about it that I stood up and announced to everyone -- including the girls -- that at least I had a dick that COULD get aroused, that the rest of the class still had these little peewee dicks. From that point on I was no longer shy, the girls liked me, and that guy became my best friend!

Did you whip it out then and there?

No. I was much more discreet.

Do you remember some time soon thereafter when you DID whip it out in some way?

I did whip it out eventually, but after that event, people -- especially girls -- asked to see it. So my friend would arrange to unzip me and pull out my dick and show it to people.

Where would that happen?

The most common place was the bottom of the stairwell at our junior high school. The stairs went down to an unused lower level, so we would go down to that bottom section and exhibit my dick.

So he would unzip you and pull you out?

Yes.

While you just stood there, acting shy!

[He smiles.]

Would he play with it?

No, not really.

Just pull it out?

Just pull it out. But it would always be semi-aroused -- at least just from the attention.

Did YOU touch it at all?

Yes. I would always pull it and tug on it to make it more impressive looking. But it was all very quick. Like a matter of two seconds because we were all afraid of getting caught.

Did you ever get caught?

No.

Any close calls?

Yes. We could tell they were close calls just from hearing people approaching.

Do you think anyone figured out what was up?

Yes. I don't think it was a very well kept secret.

Any grownups?

Yes, probably.

Did any teachers know you had a big dick?

Probably, but not that I knew of at the time. Looking back on photographs and looking at my bulge, I don't think it was very much of a secret.

What's the most annoying way someone comes on to you -- like in a bar or at a party?

[He thinks quite awhile.] I guess the most annoying line is when a customer grabs my dick and says "And I bet you're a bottom."

If someone saw you in a bar, and figured out you had a big dick, what would be the best line for him to use to get you interested in him?

[Another long pause.] Lines don't really impress me; it's the face that attracts me.

So if he looked like Brad Pitt?

I would be home with him in a moment! Or at least in the bathroom with him!

No... really? The bathroom?

[He laughs.]

What would be the worst line?

Someone who said, "Impressive, but mine's bigger."

Did someone ever say that?

Several times.

I can see that you're cut.

Yes.

Which do you prefer in other men?

I really like both equally.

Ever thought of getting your foreskin restored?

No.

Has your dick ever docked with an uncut guy?

Yes.

What was your hottest docking experience?

With another dancer -- and we would do it quite regularly. He's really cute, so it's a lot of fun.

What's your dick's favorite place to go?

Up the ass of some really cute boy.

What's your dick's favorite place to go that YOU would rather it DIDN'T go?

In pants.

What was the most surprising thing you discovered where you didn't think you liked something but your dick said it did?

Into the mouth of a woman.

What's your favorite way of USING your dick?

To please someone whom I think is very attractive.

What makes a dick pretty, or good-looking?

The person it's attached to.

Do you think you have a pretty dick?

Yes, I guess so.

Has anyone ever drawn or sketched your dick?

I don't think so.

Have you ever drawn or sketched your own dick?

No.

Who was the oldest person ever to see your dick?

[He chuckles.] I don't remember his name. I guess the guy who used to come to this Gathering who was 98 -- he died a few years ago. It's really hard to say because I perform in public.

The youngest person?

Just the kids in junior high.

When was the last time your Mom saw your dick?

Just a couple of years ago, I was sharing a hotel room with my parents and we were in two double beds. Although I went to sleep fully clothed I woke up entirely naked with my clothes thrown across to the other side of the room. My parents found it so funny that they would not retrieve them for me! I had to get up and go get them myself. I have a bad habit of stripping while I'm asleep.

Were your parents that cool about nudity when you were younger?

Yes. I guess my Mom saw my pictures from Mykonos [at a nude beach] only a few months ago.

Is your father cut or uncut?

My father is uncut.

Does your father have a big dick?

Average sized. No.

You said you had a brother...

He has about a one-inch dick. [He's joking, referring to a previous answer.]

Does your dick have a name?

No.

Has it EVER had a name, like when you were younger?

No.

Have you ever had the feeling that there is something wrong with your dick?

Definitely NO!

[At this point we have to stop, since it's the last day of the Gathering and Mark has to leave. I pick up the interview again by phone a few months later.]

Have you ever had the feeling that there is something wrong with your dick?

Hmmm... only once, but it was blueballs.

How'd you get them?

I went on a long weekend with my parents and didn't ejaculate for 3 days.

So there was a lot of sexual tension?

Not tension, just pain!

Did you TRY to jerk off?

When I told my father about the pain he told me exactly what it was and told me to go into the bathroom to take care of it, so I did, and felt better.

When you're wearing clothes, do you keep your dick inside underpants?

Sometimes.

Boxers or briefs?

Both; it depends on what I'm wearing. I own and wear both equally.

Does it hang to the left or to the right?

Mostly to the right.

How do you arrange it inside briefs?

It mostly goes wherever it goes.

Think of the period of time in the gym between when you're totally naked in the shower and when you're totally clothed and ready to walk out the front door. Let's say that that's 20 minutes. For how many of those 20 minutes is your dick naked and visible to other guys in the locker room?

Probably 18 of the 20 minutes. Being an exhibitionist, my pants are the last thing I put on before the shoes.

Has there ever been a period in your life of one year or more during which NO ONE other than you saw your dick?

No.

When is the last time someone saw your dick?

This morning at 3 AM.

In the bar?

In the bar. About 300 people saw it.

Because it was Saturday night in the strip show bar?

Right!

I don't know why I know this [on the phone], but I think you're smiling, right?

[He laughs.] Yes!

So you really enjoy it when guys see your dick!

Yes.

When will be the next time?

What time is it now... One hour, 45 minutes from now, when I'm back to work in the bar: Secrets, in the back of Ziegfield's. Their website is www.secretsdc.com.

What's your dick doing right now?

It's resting, pointing straight up toward my bellybutton.

So you're lying down?

Yes. I'm reclining with shoulders up, and body reclining.

How hard are you?

I'm not hard; I'm soft.

Are you naked?

Yes.

Were you naked when the interview began?

Yes.

In high school, how often did other boys see your dick?

I guess 3 times a week in gym class, minimum.

There would be other times?

Yeah, in the pool, changing rooms, in the summertime. I went skinny-dipping a lot in the lake.

Where was the lake?

It was a few miles from where I lived.

Girls?

Not very often. Very infrequently.

What would be the occasion?

They saw it more often in junior high school. [He thinks a long time.] I can't really recall.

And in college?

It was an all-male college, so guys saw my dick all the time we swam naked in the pool. Girls never saw my dick -- only at a few parties, I guess. They were typical college parties; late in the evening people would pair up without much privacy.

So you paired up with a girl from time to time?

Yes.

Are you bisexual?

Yes.

Tell me more about the college where you swam nude.

It was a small private all-male college in the midwest.

Nowadays, during an average week, how many men see your dick?

[He laughs.] An average week would be probably a thousand to 1200. Sounds crazy, doesn't it?

But that's at the bar, right?

Yes.

How many women?

Probably about a hundred. Most come to the bar, but not all. Some women see it privately, and that happens maybe a couple of times a month. At a bachelorette party, too -- maybe 3 or 4 times a year.

What's the wildest bachelorette party story you have to tell?

It was about 2 years ago. I was asked to perform and I didn't know at the time that the girl who was getting married was a female stripper (for men) and all the girls in attendance were, too. Needless to say they were a lot more outgoing than the normal group of girls! It seemed that they wanted very much to do things to me that men try to do to them, I guess.

Such as?

Such as grabbing me as they tip me, licking me as they tip me, that sort of thing, and they weren't inhibited about doing it in front of the other girls. In most groups of women I've danced for, they're a lot more shy about that stuff.

Of course, everybody knows that a lot of teenaged boys get hard at inappropriate times -- and in a way so that other people can see that they're hard. Did this ever happen to you?

I'm sure it did but I don't remember anything that sticks out in my mind.

Did anyone ever tease you or punish you when they noticed that your dick was hard?

Only that time in the shower.

Tell me about the first time your dick ejaculated. What happened?

It was basically a wet dream. I remember the dream very clearly. I was asleep and dreaming that I was in the school cafeteria. As I was passing through the line to get my food in the dream, my crotch was rubbing up against the the counter as I was moving along with the group. I liked that, and in the dream I kept going back and forth and forth -- and eventually came. As I came I woke up and realize that the movement of my dick made me come.

What's the shortest length of time you've ever had between two orgasms?

Probably about 5 minutes.

Guys I interview for Dick of the Week usually are exhibitionistic -- at least a little. Think back in your life to any times when you may have fantasized or thought about showing off your dick to someone else, on purpose. How old were you the FIRST time you had a thought or a fantasy like that?

Hmmm, I would say probably 5th or 6th grade.

What was the fantasy?

I used to purposely get dressed in the morning starting off totally naked with the window blinds open in my bedroom.

Did you ever carry it out?

Yes.

How many people MIGHT have seen you?

I doubt anyone really did. There was the possibility that someone COULD have that made it exciting. But if someone walked by I would quickly run and hide.

So your bedroom was at ground level?

No, one floor up.

Has anyone other than you ever touched your dick in a sexual way in a church?

Yes. [He chuckles.] When I was about 20 I had a relationship with someone, and we somewhat regularly had sex in church.

At a Boy Scout event?

Hmmm! No, I don't think so.

While your parents were nearby?

Depends on what you mean by nearby. I've had sex in the bedroom NEXT to my parents', while they were one room away.

How old were you?

When I was 24.

When you think back on your life, do you think you were a nudist your whole life, or did you only become a nudist at some particular age?

I guess I became a nudist when I was 18 and old enough to do that legally -- go somewhere on my own.

Which would you prefer: To live in a world where everyone had to be naked all the time -- men and women -- or to live in a world where you had to be naked all the time but everyone else was clothed?

I would prefer where everyone had to be naked.

Which would you prefer: To have a photo published in a magazine of just your dick next to your real name, or to have an anonymous photo published showing both your dick and your face?

Anonymous with my dick and my face.

What's the most embarrassing thing your dick ever did?

[He quietly repeats question to himself.] That's kind of a hard question... I can't think of any.

What has your dick done that has made you the most proud?

I guess when it won the $500 at a big dick contest!

How long ago?

About 18 years ago.

What's the most outrageously exhibitionistic thing you've ever done?

I guess Halloween one time I went to a gay bar -- but not a strip bar -- and their Halloween contest had several categories, including "Most revealing", so I went as a flasher wearing nothing underneath. As the contest had people coming up one by one to show their costume I just opened my raincoat when it was time. I had the drag queen and two other people just sort of jump on me because that sort of thing wasn't expected. But I DID win the category!

One more example. One time after several drinks a friend, and before I danced regularly in the club in DC, I had some friends in town and they wanted to go down to the strip-show bar where I had danced a few times (but not regularly). When I told them I'd dance they didn't believe me and they challenged me to get naked in the car on the way down. Which I did, and then they challenged me even further, opened up the sunroof, and stuck my body out so I was sitting with almost my entire body on top of the car, totally naked driving through the streets of DC.

How long did that naked trip last?

Probably about 10 blocks.

How many people saw you?

Well, I'm not sure exactly, but there was a group of gay guys in a car who followed us for some time, flashing their lights and honking their horns!

When you arrived a the bar, did you get out of the car nude?

I don't think so. Not that I remember.

In your whole life, what event or situation made your dick the hardest it has ever been?

Probably it was at the bachelorette party where the strippers were girls, which was one of the first times I'd ever taken Viagra, since I was worried about my performance with women -- which turned out not to be necessary.

Tell me about the first time your dick was photographed.

I think it was 1983. It was for a magazine called Stars. I was also in one called Hot Male Review, and in Blueboy. The photographer just sold the photos to different magazines.

Has your dick ever been published in a non-porno magazine?

Yes, the GNI Informer. And I'm in the book Naked Places [third edition; the fourth edition is now available] -- once in the Wisconsin section, and in the back with Naked Tony [at the beginning of the Regional/Worldwide listings].

On the Internet?

Yes.

What does your dick do when you dance naked?

It does a lot of things! I dance a lot so it's hard sometimes, soft sometimes.

When you're dancing naked, do you think about how moving your body will move your dick? Do you do anything on purpose because of the way it's going to cause your dick to swing?

Definitely. I guess I do everything... back and forth, up and down, and spinning it both clockwise and counterclockwise.

Have you ever exposed your dick in a non-visible way -- for example, by taking your bathing suit off underwater?

I guess so but I can't think of any.

Have you ever been naked in public?

Yes. I've had sex on airplanes and on trains. Actually quite a few places. Including that time on top of the car.

So you are definitely a member of the Mile High club. And the Amtrak club!

So you did it in one of those teeny airplane restrooms?

No. I did it in the last row of Coach.

So tell me more.

We sucked each other, and also fucked.

Did you fuck him?

Yes.

Him you?

No.

Not counting a Gathering, what's the largest number of people who have seen your dick all at the same time?

I guess about 400 at a time in the club. Or on some of the beaches, like in Mykonos, there's thousands of people. I've also water-skied naked.

Tell me about the first time your dick accidentally became visible and might have been seen by someone you didn't intend to show it to.

I think I was in college, my freshman year in college. I was in the TV room and there was another guy watching TV whom I didn't know. He made a move on me and I responded that I wasn't interested, and he said then why were you showing me your dick? -- you're wearing short shorts and no underwear underneath!

When you're at a urinal in a public place -- like an airport -- how often do you do things specifically so that other guys nearby can see your dick?

Pretty often.

Do you want them to do something in return?

Sometimes. Depends on who it is and who they look like.

Has your dick ever been paid to do something?

Yes. Strip.

Has your dick ever been exposed to view against your will?

Not really AGAINST my will, but while I've been passed out or unaware of it, yes. Not that I would have complained that much!

What do you like the most about your dick?

I guess how long it is.

What do you like the most about having a dick?

I don't know. I guess, getting off.

What do you like the most about having a BIG dick?

Having lots of guys want to suck it and ride it.

What do you like the least about your dick?

[He thinks a bit.] I guess the fact that it's circumcised.

You wish you were uncut?

Well, sometimes. There's nothing else that I think about even possibly changing about it.

What do you like the least about having a dick?

Nothing.

What do you like the least about having a big dick?

Nothing. I wouldn't want it any other way!

Has your dick ever gotten you in trouble?

[He chuckles.] Not any serious trouble.

But maybe a little trouble?

No. Sometimes I'll stay out too late, and so on.

Have you ever had an orgasm in a car while the car was moving?

Yes.

Were you driving?

Sometimes. When I drive a long way I sometimes masturbate while I'm driving. I have been driving while other guys went down on me, and I've also had sex in the back seat while the car was moving.

But not while you were driving?

No!

Have you ever had an orgasm on an airplane?

Yes.

...on a train or subway car?

Yes, on a train. Mostly in Europe. I've had sex on Amtrak, too. On a train in England recently I was traveling with someone I knew and no one else was in the compartment.

...on a boat?

Yes. I stayed on the Queen Mary, in Long Beach, the floating hotel.

...underwater?

Yes. In hot tubs and in pools. I thought everyone has!

...in your parents' bedroom?

Yes. When I was young I used to go there when I was alone in the house and masturbate with my father's Playboys and my mothers Playgirls.

...at school?

Yes, when I was in college we students would often go to a classroom at night.

So there would be a circle jerk in a classroom?

No, just one on one. Just me and a guy.

His idea or your idea?

It was a common idea. Where I went to school, the classrooms always locked from the inside. It was probably the most common place to have sex! It wasn't my favorite.

...at work?

Kind of; does traveling on business count?

Sure, why not!

The time I was telling you about [regarding the Mile High club] was with a flight attendant who was sort of the instigator; it was me and the flight attendant, plus a friend who kind of wanted to watch. It was not a crowded flight, so we moved to the back row, 5 across, and the friend served as the lookout. Most of the other flight attendants knew what was happening, so they kind of watched out for us.

Have you ever come in a place where, if you and I were to go there right now, you could show me your dried cum?

No, not that I can think of.

Tell me about the one orgasm in your life of which you are most ashamed.

I can't think of any.

...of which you are the most proud?

The one that comes to mind is kind of an odd thing. One time when I was dancing several years ago, the rules were much more relaxed than they are now. There was a very loudmouthed drag queen who came in one time and I was above her, very erect, and as soon as she sat down she pointed to her chest and said, "Go ahead come right here" -- and I did, almost instantly.

Were you planning on involving her somehow?

No, it was very spur of the moment. Her reaction and everyone's was to be doubled over in laughter, which made it very satisfying. A nonsexual orgasm!

So did her suggestion kind of turn you on?

No, I saw it more as a challenge.

When you jerk off, how do you hold your dick in your hand?

I don't know. Normally with my right hand, sometimes with both.

What motion do you use?

Mostly just up and down.

Do you feel like jerking off right now?

No.

Why not?

I'm just not thinking about that. I have to be at work in an hour.

During this interview, has your dick gotten hard? Is it hard now?

No. No.

Starting the clock at the end of this interview, how long will it be before you have an orgasm?

It'll probably be at 3 o'clock this next morning.

So you jerk off at the end of your workday?

When I come home, or if I don't pair up with somebody.

No more blueballs for you!

No, I cum every day, without exception.

Anything else you'd like to say about dicks in general or your dick in particular?

No, not really. My dick speaks for itself!

Thank you very much!

You're welcome!

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